Online dating can be difficult to navigate for a Christian who takes their faith seriously. This is especially true when it comes to using secular dating apps and websites outside of the Christian niche. But should Christians use these mediums for finding a date online?
Yes, it’s perfectly acceptable to use common dating apps as a Christian. These don’t need to be labeled as “Christian” before becoming appropriate for a Christian to use them. It’s much more important for a Christian’s behavior to be appropriate when using them. It’s all about how you use the service provided.
Here’s a guide for how to be successful using mainstream dating apps as a Christian. We’ve included some tips for your profile, filters, matches, and conversations. There are plenty of other Christians out there on mainstream dating services looking for their match.
Your Profile
It’s important that your dating profile represent what you’re all about. That means listing the basics about yourself, but you should definitely include something about your Christian faith too. After all, you’re looking for another Christian to date.
You should definitely upload at least one photo of yourself. We suggest uploading three or more to give others a good look at you. Remember not to post any irreverent or irresponsible photos that might bring shame upon the reputation of Christ.
Representing Christ through online dating also means watching what you write on your profile. Make sure you aren’t using curse words or other obscenities unbecoming of a Christian. Everyone wants to put their best foot forward in dating, but don’t stretch the truth about yourself in order to make a good impression. Keep what you write on your profile consistent with the character of Christ.
Your Filters
Most dating sites have some form of filter system that lets you search for specific people to match with. These allow you to search for certain types of people by selecting criteria in different categories. When it comes to narrowing down your matches, there is no filter more important than the “religion” category.
Before you start sending messages to people, you’ll want to find that part within the filters section and then select “Christian” or “Christianity.” This will narrow down your matches to other people who also profess faith in Jesus as Christ. Some sites even go so far as to list certain denominations as filterable options to choose from.
The other filters will help you find a particular type of Christian. For example, is smoking a dealbreaker for you? How about drinking? What about their political ideology? What if they already have children? These filters are good for avoiding unwanted surprises later down the road of the relationship.
Your Matches
If you’ve followed our suggestions thus far, you should have a robust profile set up for others to see. Additionally, you should only be seeing other Christians that meet your filtered criteria. Following those steps has produced unique Christian matches near you!
Depending on your worldwide location, you might have thousands of matches or only just a few. If you’re only seeing a small number of matches, it’s most likely due to the limited radius of your geographical search. Dating apps typically use your phone’s location to pinpoint the matches nearest to you.
Remember, cities always have more population than the countryside. Urban areas have will produce more match results than rural areas. So if you run out of matches, go to the settings menu of the online dating app and increase your search radius to encompass the nearest city.
Your Conversations
Now it’s time to find and talk to few people that interest you. It’s okay to be picky about who you approach romantically. All you’re trying to do here is start a conversation with a few people that you’d like to get to know better.
Unfortunately, just because you have Christianity as a filter for your matches doesn’t mean other people are doing the same thing. So, even though you’ve specified your search results to display other Christians, you might still get messages from non-Christians who see you in their own search results. It’s important to know how to respond to them.
Non-Christians
Firstly, you aren’t under any obligation to respond to anyone that messages you. Don’t feel pressured to write back to messages that make you uneasy. Sometimes this might even be the best approach to someone of a different religion, especially if you aren’t equipped to answer questions and accusations about Christianity through Apologetics.
Nevertheless, some people don’t have a specific religion selected or displayed on their profile. They might have forgotten to fill it out or simply opted not to say. This is a good opportunity to point out this fact and ask them what they believe about God.
Asking this question opens up many possibilities, and that’s exactly what you’re wanting to do. Firstly, if they are atheistic or a follower of another religion, this would be a good time to tell them that you only date other Christians. However, they might be agnostic and be open to learning about God. Lastly, they might turn out to be a new Christian convert who just didn’t complete that portion of their profile when they originally joined.
Christians
This is the group of people that you’re looking to go on dates with. Following all of our previous instructions will land them in your crosshairs and you in theirs too. See, now you know that other Christians do exist on mainstream dating apps!
The topics of your conversation with fellow believers can vary from person to person, and that’s totally fine! It’s nice to operate under the comfort of knowing that their core beliefs are aligned with your own. That makes the rest of the conversation come easily.
You will eventually want to broach the subject of Christian. We suggest engaging in this kind of conversation once you’re certain it’s someone that you’d like to pursue a serious relationship with. At that point, you should start getting to know this person on a spiritual level. Every good Christian dating relationship is built on holy foundations.