Mom is a name used around the world and in all languages. For most children, it’s a term of endearment for one of their parents. For most adults, the title brings back deeply beloved memories of their own childhood. For you and your kiddo(s), it’s life.
We want to congratulate you on becoming a mom, and we’re confident that you can live up to the responsibility of it. Remember to keep the Christian faith as part of their upbringing, and you’ll have a headstart on the security of their eternal future (Pro. 22:6). Speaking of big responsibilities and raising children, we know that help is both required and wanted at times.
Well, that’s what we’re here to help you do. We’re hoping to provide you with some solid tips for finding a permanent helpmate in the form of a spouse. With that in mind, below is our guide for single moms to land a lifelong Christian partner.
It might come as no surprise that single dads are your best match. You all have so much in common already and are able to relate to each other in ways only other parents can. The single-parent dynamic makes you both uniquely cut puzzle pieces that are a good fit.
Most single men without children aren’t specifically looking for single moms. That’s not to say the story might be different if the opportunity presented itself, but typically, they aren’t looking to get involved in this situation like single dads are. So much about these types of relationships are built upon the little unspoken but understood intangibles of being a parent.
It takes a special man to be a good father. Instead of risking your child(ren)’s upbringing on someone unproven, we suggest searching for a man who’s already attempting to be a good father.
Searching for a Husband
It’s meaningful to portray upfront that you’re looking for a husband. Firstly, marriage is the goal of dating, and single Christians are only allowed to be married to other Christians. Secondly, your intentions are best telegraphed to others with your words and your actions—both are important.
Words are initially important. Stating your intent upfront will help clear away the unqualified candidates for a step-father. An immature man will recoil from the call to be a husband and step-father.
Actions are ultimately important. Demonstrating your fidelity to the commands of Christ and obeying the moral instructions of the Bible is the best way to get rid of immoral men who are dating you for their own pleasures. Believe us, it’s better to weed these types of men out now than to suffer them for a lifetime in the future.
The man who perseveres through both of these checkpoints is a potential suitor. He will demonstrate a desire to be a husband to you and step-father to your child(ren), and though it may be difficult at times, he will resolve to wait until marriage to be sexually intimate. This is the type of Christian man to desire and find…we promise you, they do exist.
When to Introduce Your Child(ren)
Everyone has an opinion on when a woman should introduce her children to a guy. Like most opinions on the matter, the answer is quite subjective.
We’re not going to present yet another answer to this question and label it “the Christian answer” for the subject. Instead, we’d like to give you a simple guideline for this circumstance. That way, you can make the decision yourself and at a moment that feels appropriate.
There is such a thing as “too soon” to introduce them. As a guideline for this situation, you never want to let your children meet them until that person is officially your boyfriend. It sets a terrible precedent for them psychologically.
Children need stability and reliability in their lives to foster a healthy mentality. It helps them feel safe and mitigates a lot of potential anxiety issues in the future. This truth is when it comes to introducing an additional (or perhaps only) father figure into their lives.
As I’m sure you’re aware, it’s not uncommon for romantic relationships to fail. Presenting your child(ren) with multiple father figures is not conducive to normative mental health. With the utmost seriousness, we suggest only introducing them to him when things are serious and borderline engagement.
However, due to the nature of life and children’s activities, sometimes an early introduction is inevitable as noted below.
Be Alert at Activities and Sports
Sports and any type of group-related recreational activities are prime spots for finding a date. Think about it for a second, and you’ll realize how obvious this has been the whole time. Single fathers are definitely roaming around these types of events.
So keep your eyes peeled! He’s chasing a kiddo around and isn’t wearing a wedding ring? Jackpot! Time to strike up a conversation.
However, although these places are great, we still want you to look for (and find) a Christian above all else. It can be hard to know if that cute guy playing catch with his son is a Christian or not just by looks alone. Well, if you can’t figure that out after a conversation or two, we’ve got you covered with one final idea.